


I Love That Lavender Blonde

by updatepls



Series: I Love That Lavender Blonde [1]
Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-08
Updated: 2014-10-08
Packaged: 2018-02-20 10:51:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2426084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/updatepls/pseuds/updatepls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How had Sarah never noticed the clean-cut grace that was present in everything about Rachel?</p><p>(You may notice that this story belongs to a series, however, it is an entirely stand-alone oneshot and is 100% able to be read on its own)</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Love That Lavender Blonde

**Author's Note:**

> 'Lavender' used here in the rarer sense of meaning gay or queer, title taken from the song So Happy I Could Die by Lady GaGa

Sarah combs her fingers through the back of Rachel's hair where it is shortest, softest, closest to her skin. She's trying to be gentle, touching her like a china doll—or a sleeping child—trying not wake the woman who, amazingly, had drifted off with her head in Sarah's lap. Even in her sleep she is guarded, hands folded neatly across her stomach, the hint of a frown on her forehead. 

Sarah wonders if she dreams of her parents, dreams of her mother. She never talks about them—never even talks about Ethan. Sarah can't imagine Rachel dreaming about anything. 

She wouldn't be acting this way if Rachel were awake; she doesn't show Rachel any sort of affection when there is a chance that she could register it as such; they have a dynamic that they do not falter from, and Sarah isn't going to be the one to break it. But here like this, in this precious moment filled with a closeness she had never thought she desired until it was laid out right in front of her, she can't help but feel fondly for the wounded creature in her lap; just as wounded as she. 

Sarah lets her gaze travel over Rachel's features: her painted lips; perfectly arched eyebrows; eyelashes longer than the rest of them, she is sure. And when she puts all the damage Rachel has done—all the cruelty she is capable of—out of her mind, Sarah sees that she is beautiful. Rachel breathes in deeply in her sleep, accentuating her clavicle, and it's all Sarah can do not to run a finger along the length of it. How had she never noticed the clean-cut grace that was present in everything about Rachel?

Disquieted by her unbidden warmth for the woman, Sarah is thankful that Rachel is more often rude than she is kind, is more frequently impassive than she is feeling, that when she smiles she is laughing at you, never with you. Sarah wants to keep it that way; does not want to fall in love. 

 _Love._ Sarah rolls her eyes at the thought, laughing under her breath. _What is the matter with her?_  
   
Rachel starts, Sarah's minimal movement enough to draw her from her shallow sleep. Sitting up, she takes it all in, somewhat embarrassed: Sarah staring at her amusedly, the television muted, the ruffled state of her blonde hair. Rachel looks at Sarah as if to say, ' _What_?' and smooths the front of her shirt with both hands (a habit of Rachel's Sarah has come to find dangerously endearing).

Sarah extends a hand to Rachel—the gesture possessing a gentleness she hasn't quite yet shaken—and Rachel's eyes snap to meet hers instantly, her expression one that Sarah has not seen her wear before. Like she isn't sure if Sarah means to hold her or hurt her. 

Slowly, Sarah scoots closer and places soft fingertips against Rachel's cheek; their mouths are just a few inches apart but Sarah doesn't kiss her, instead she just looks at Rachel solemnly, waiting— _asking._ Rachel closes her eyes with a strange look of resignation—a huff of feigned indifference—and brushes her lips against Sarah's just the slightest bit, coaxing her into a fuller kiss. 

**Author's Note:**

> And that's as close as I could come to Propunk fluff without feeling like I was disobeying the laws of physics. 
> 
> But while we're on physics, two negatives do make a positive and sometimes I like to imagine that as two ass-kicking ladies who haven't always been such great people, in an AU somewhere Sarah and Rachel might have an unexpectedly close and caring relationship idk. But that's another headcanon for another day...


End file.
